Hi there! Writing again after a long gap. Thoughts came; thoughts went. I didn't find anything worth writing about. Today is Janmashthami. Independence Day passed by weeks earlier. I've been thinking and thinking very seriously about being Indian and what it means. To me. Because I belong to a generation that is neither here nor there. I speak a language that belongs to another country, I wear clothes that are pretty much worn by the rest of the world. So what is it that makes me quintessentially Indian? I never anticipated that it would be so difficult. Not only do I speak in English most of the time interspersed with Bengali, I also think in the language like my mother observed. I've to keep searching for words in my mother tongue whereas it is so much easier to write and read in English. It ought to have been my second language but like many people of my generation and the succeeding generations it is not the case. I'm a bit of a mongrel as one of the characters in my stories observed. Rootlessness is typical of our generation irrespective of the country we belong to, but India itself has been subject to myriad influences -ruled by so many different invaders that to isolate anything purely Indian might not be possible anymore. There's the Mughal influence, the British, the Portugese(Goa), the French (Pondicherry)- the list is endless. So then let's just get down to it. What do I understand by being Indian?
1. Religion. We are a very religious country. Or we used to be. Lately, religion seems to be losing much of its hold unless it is to riot in the name of religion and fling mud at each other using it as an excuse. A roadside tree hacked to death sprouted new leaves along with a number of small shrines nestling at its base with red threads tied around its trunk and a horde of devotees flocking to it every week on Saturday near my house. India is probably the only place in the world where a stone can be worshipped with fervor- such is the power of belief here. Recently though it seems much in abeyance and the rape incidents have increased. From being the mecca of travellers all over world as a spiritual destination India has earned the honor of being the rape country( not only capital) in the world. A reason I find myself hanging my head in shame and finding it difficult to call myself an Indian. Children? Babies? No one it seems is exempt from predators. It is no longer the "golden India"(Jahan dal dal par sone ki chidiya karti hai basera) of my youth. No longer a country where women children,boys or anyone for that matter, is safe.
2. Food. We are a very very food-centric nation. All our festivals and celebrations revolve around food. It might be true of other cultures and countries but India cannot be rivaled in the sheer diversity of our festivals and celebrations and the many dishes these celebrations merit.
3. Mother. Yes. We Indians venerate our mothers. Make no mistake. Women are exploited here, much more than other countries. But the mother occupies a position of power in the household. It is a strange metamorphosis that happens and very interesting to watch. More so if she has spawned the male child. Then she speaks from a position of absolute power. The kitchen and the hearth is most often the center of the house. The mother may or may not be vocal, may or may not be an active decision maker but from behind the pallu the most illiterate mother wields an enormous influence.
4. Getting old is easier here. The enormous emphasis that other cultures have on sex and appearance is absent here. Now things are changing. Mummies are becoming yummier. But by and large you can blissfully slide into your "aunty-ness' and live happily with those tires around your waist once you advance in age. Sometimes even before. It is only in the pre- marriage stage that appearance plays an important part. Post marriage and solid years into marriage you are free to expand. Not only your horizons but your waistline. But like I said things are changing and Indian women too are balking at their slide into aunty-ness. As for me I think this obsessive emphasis on appearance can be daunting at times. It is good to be comfortable with your wrinkles and paunch and incipient baldness. Only in India can an actor like Sanjeev Kumar be revered as a hero, paunch and all.
5. Take it slow. This I think is the most irritating thing about being Indian. Punctuality is not our national character and nothing gets done on time. Dheere- Dheere (Slowly) everything happens. Oh so slowly. Shops open late. Work takes time. Court cases drag on for centuries. If you wish for speed you might as well be dead or on the way to it. Being Indian means having oodles and oodles of patience. Wait. Just wait. Then wait some more. If you are not dead or buried by then. ASAP has no meaning here.
6. Public conveniences and public property are always defaced, torn apart, vandalized. We go to DLF mall in Noida, a very posh mall by all accounts, and you can find seats missing back rests within a few months. Then escalators don't work. I strongly think we as public don't deserve the best facilities because we don't take care of the ones provided to us.
7. Children. We don't push our young ones out of the nest when they turn eighteen. Living at home even when you are twenty five or thirty or beyond, is acceptable and not an oddity. Mothers may treat their children as babies even after their hair has turned grey. Fathers may freely offer advice and exert control over their children even when they are beyond the adult age. This is very Indian.
Off hand these are the things I think are unique to being Indian. At least what makes me Indian. What about you? What do you think?
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